Your Random Repo

Recently my friend gave me a link to a politician's website. I couldn't help but read then get hooked and curse every swear word i know at the same time. IMO i think all politicians are either full of shit or a hypocrite or both. So ive decided i would dedicate this post to all the politicians in Malaysia. Congrats on making complete fools out of yourselves. Here goes.. T here are two squashed corpses on the North-South highway. One is a dead dog, the other is a dead politician. What's the difference? There are skid marks before the dog. H illary Clinton was out jogging one morning. As she passed a small boy she saw that he had a box full of puppies. She stopped and asked the little boy what kind of puppies he had. He looked up proudly and said, 'They're all Democrats.' Hillary was pleased as she just jogged away. She returned home and told her husband the story. About a week later Bill was jogging by a young man with a box full of puppies. He stopped and asked ...

A young Chinese student was travelling in a train compartment with a ferocious soldier, an old lady an a stunningly attractive young lady. The train went through a tunnel. In the darkness they heard a kiss followed by a resounding smack. When they came out of the tunnel the soldier was rubbing a very swollen face, and they each contemplated what must have just happened... The old lady thought, 'What a proper young lady that is to chastise the soldier for his unwelcomed advances.' The young lady thought, 'Why would the soldier want to kiss the old lady instead of an attractive person like me?' The soldier thought, 'That student is a lucky asshole. He gets to kiss the young lady and i get the smack.' But the student knew all along, 'I'm a cunning fellow. I kiss the back of my hand, give the soldier one tight slap and get away with it' An American oil-drilling company was erecting a new offshore platform in total isolation. Their industrial psychologist...

Some things are just not as it seems.. W hat do an intelligent blonde and an easter bunny have in common? No one has seen either of them H ow do you confuse blondes? Sit them in a round room and ask them to find the corner W hy was the blonde so pleased when she finished the puzzle in 6 months? Because the cover said 3 to 5 years H ow do you know when a blonde's been doing a crossword? Because all the boxes are coloured in H ow does a blonde kill a fish? She drowns it H ow many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? 3. One to find a ladder, one to find a lightbulb and one to find a man to do the job W hy are blondes like toilets? Because they are either engaged or full of shit A blonde and a brunette were walking in the park when suddenly the brunette says, 'Oh, a dead bird!' The blonde looked up and said, 'where, where?' W hat do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted W hat's the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Gets dressed and goes home W ...

I found this somewhere in the internet. These are basically pick up lines for pick-up artists, plain wannabes or just total idiots. Read on... The Lazy Talker Man: Wow! The Totally Lost Man: I lost my number.. Girl: Huh?? Man: Can i have yours? The Geek Man: I love YOU!! Girl: ...weirdo The Player Man: May i know your name? Girl: Not in this lifetime!! (*roll eyes*) Man: Thats ok. It would save some trouble too as i would have probably forgotten it anyways by the end of the night.=) So how bout me buying you a drink? The Clueless Man: *runs straight to a girl and kisses her* Girl: What was that for?? Man: Oh.. im too drunk to think of a pick up line.. *walks away* The Dont Even Try's He could have just drowned himself in those tits. For The Impersonater Man: Im a celebrity! Girl: Wahh.. Take pics of me! Man: Okok.. *takes pics* Girl: Thanks!! *walks away* Man: *dammit* For The Ah Bengs Man: Wah lao eh! You an Chua sI BeH SuI Le! You gal me Man *raise arms exposing fats* Leks PoK P...